The Cottonwood Tucson Experience

The Breakfast Club

We all come to Cottonwood Tucson for various reasons, bringing along all shapes and sizes of baggage; with the common denominator being the desire to get well. It is understood that some have a greater desire than others do. At Cottonwood, we are stripped bare and completely exposed in an environment that is safe and nurturing. It is because of the caring and sharing that goes on that amazing bonds are built while on campus. We have taken those bonds beyond the campus.

For the past two years, since our mutual time at Cottonwood Tucson we have stayed in close contact. The "Breakfast Club" began as a group that had early breakfast together on the upper patio. We come from all over the world and are bound by common Cottonwood experience. Each breakfast began with going around the table one by one, giving your three core feelings for the day, and answering a ten-question self-evaluation. We could then move on to having breakfast.

We continue our experience via email, through the marvels of modern technology. We try to check in as often as possible and each email begins with your three core feelings. This is the safest place on earth. You can share any information that you choose and feel comfortable. Knowing that you are going to get responses that come from love and caring. If someone is not contributing for any length of time they are checked up on and reminded that whatever reason they are not communicating does not matter, we want to hear from you. You will never be reprimanded for not writing whatever the reason. This is all done out of love.

The Breakfast Club has become a family. We visit each other, hold reunions, meet each other's "real" families, and are as close as people can be. We owe this to Cottonwood and our own individual experience there. Cottonwood has introduced us, showed us how to open up and let in others with no judgment and develop the ability to share. Being able to share is a key force in each person's recovery.

With all this said, we want to thank Cottonwood Tucson for giving each of us the knowledge and tools that brought the Breakfast Club together.

Ellen S., Cottonwood Tucson Alumni

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, Life Lessons, and Relationships

Not too long ago a friend recommended that I read the book Life Lessons by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. As experts on death and dying she and co-author David Kessler write about their views on how to life life based upon the lessons they have learned in working with those who are dying. I have to say that I was at first put off by the book. I was thinking that it was full of trite sayings. Then I realized that this book was written while Kubler-Ross herself was dying and that she was trying to pack in as much wisdom that she had gained over the years and wanted to share before she herself died. Then I began to see the book as a treasure full of knowledge that I need to pay attention to.

In her chapter on relationships she talks about how all our encounters, however brief, are relationships and important for learning how to love. In this I think about my wife to whom no one is a stranger. She makes friends with everyone she meets and builds relationships with those people such as grocery clerks, librarians, postal workers, and others with whom she meets just once or sees on a regular basis. She sees each person as important and each encounter as more important than any task she happens to be trying to accomplish. Almost always we are some of the last people to leave church or events because there are too many people to encounter. I used to get irritated by this but have realized that I have much to learn from her. I have tended to focus on the task at hand and get preoccupied by thinking of the next task. To her the person is more important.By watching her I am slowly learning to focus my attention and to be mindful in my encounters with people.

So I am enjoying the book so far and recommend Life Lessons to anyone trying to live a fuller and more meaningful life.

Thought for the day

"The common denominator in all your relationships is you".

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross